Something for the weekend

Dreams: Found my purse, don’t know where but everything was in place, fifty, cards, etc.

This morning, just before I got up – went to stir the boy and he said, “Don’t get up, it’s only ten to seven.” Ten minutes later I really woke and it was five past ten.

Wrote a few stories I was proud of, ideas for which have left me for now. Still have the urge to write one about an underwater pillow.

…..

I think when you start to worry about the possibility/inevitability of losing someone, you start to fail to do your duties in the relationship, and see it as a different, more self-serving craving than the nurturing creature it was before.

Spoke to my self-appointed mentor for my depression tonight, the old friend who had conquered depression and is my support, my empathy pit-stop. He is not doing well. He has come dangerously close to suicide.

I had my purse stolen again last week – second time my driving license has gone in a few months.

Had my first counselling appointment, ‘assessment session’. Didn’t click with the woman, cried, avoided her gaze for an hour while she asked me one-word-answer questions, told her I felt I needed to come and sort things out but she told me to call her within a week or she’d cancel my referral. Well, I didn’t want to speak to her again so I didn’t call. Looks like another six months on a waiting list, if my doctor reapproves me for it, unless I convince them that I need to see someone else. Sadly the week has passed and although I called the doctor within the allotted time, they didn’t call me back. So, thanks. Guess it’s just me and the pills for a while longer.

Slept this weekend except for the time it took to get up and watch Taken last night, and the time to go for a goodbye meal with the Nearlies tonight. Straight back after. Still need more.

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